Parenting Olympics

I have discovered, by becoming a mum to two, that I have some real talent! I’ve learned some valuable lessons in parenting which give me hope should there be any additional sports introduced for future Olympics. I may be too late for London 2012 but you never know! Perhaps we should just kick off the Parenting Olympics 2012? Could you make the team?

New Sport: Sleep Deprivation-talathon- I will be a formidable competitor in the Sleep Deprivation-tathalon. Competitors are allowed sleep but only in 90 minute bursts. Sleep during those 90 minutes is bombarded with sounds, lights and general panic (“Is my child still moving?”). Competitors participate in 5 events following each 90 minute burst of disturbed sleep:

1st event- Nightmare Soothing-Rushing 20 feet into a darkened bedroom with a formerly sleeping child who is now screaming. The competitor who can successfully negotiate toys, clothes and small furniture obstacles to soothe their child the fastest wins!

2nd event- Bottle Dash- Racing down a flight of stairs to a darkened kitchen to boil a kettle and prepare a formula bottle to a specific temperature and following non-existent NHS guidelines for safe bottle preparation while a screaming baby shouts through the baby monitor. Extra points if this event can be completed with a baby in one arm.

3rd event- School Run- Each competitor will be allocated at least 2 children with a minimum of 2 years age difference between them. For additonal points a 3rd child can be added or 1 of the 2 children can be a newborn. Competitors will have 45 minutes to get all children fed, dressed in coordinating, matching clothing, comb hair, pack school bags and prevents tears at all costs. Competitor must also get herself bathed, dressed and made-up for the school run. The first family out of the door wins!

4th event- Poopy Nappy Race- Competitors will be faced with a fully filled, fully poonami-sized nappy which is beginning to leave the confines of the nappy on a fully dressed, fully screaming newborn. Competitors must remove the offending nappy, fully clear the nappy area to a high standard, remove leaked-upon clothes, place a new nappy on the child and re-clothe with a new outfit in the fastest amount of time. Additional points with a male baby when competitors avoid being weed upon!

5th event- Mummy-nastics- This particularly challenging event involves getting 2 children, aged 3 and 6 weeks ready to get in the car. A changing bag must be fully stocked as well as bottles/food/snacks packed for every eventuality. Children must be clothed for the weather of the moment, installed in car seats safely, securely and per national guidelines, the car packed, boot stocked with the appropriate pushchair and NO TEARS from either child or mother…all accomplished in 20 minutes or less. Bonus points for the fewest dashes from house to car and remembering to shut off all lights and lock the door.

I am sure to be picked for Team GB! What about you? Oh, wait! Damn! I’m not a Citizen! I’ll have to try to make Team USA! Boo!

In addition to my talents for the Parening Olympics team, I have been able to manage the following ONE HANDED: make a cup of tea, prepare a bottle, mix(from scratch) and throw gluten-free french bread in the oven, chop potatoes, type out emails, eat, wee, tidy the house and hoover. Will my abilities never cease?

What Parenting Olympic sport would you excel at?

I thought I had it all figured out!

I thought I had it all figured out. This parenting thing that is. We’ve made it through 3 1/2 years relatively unscathed. Ella is happy, healthy, active, clever, verbal, emotional and delightful. Mark and I are still married and, more importantly, still love each other, speak to each other, kiss each other and want to spend most of our time together.

We’d moved from needing pushchairs, high chairs, changing bags, bottles, formula, changes of clothes and an hour lead time befoer leaving the house. Going out and about was a hell of a lot simpler. We’d even managed to reduce the number of middle-of-the-night wake-up calls! Sleep was no longer so illusive.

Then Sam joined our lives and made us a family of four. We are so pleased to have Sam in our life. He’s simply delightful, honestly. He’s a very laid back baby who only puts up a fuss when he’s naked, having a nappy change or waiting for a bottle. Fair enough! Sam will be 6 weeks old tomorrow so we’ve had a fair bit of time to get used to life this way. I believe at the 6 week mark, one can no longer use “I’ve only recently had a baby” as an excuse. Why do I need excuses? Well, I’m struggling a bit, to tell you the truth.

Yesterday was the first PROPER day that Ella, Sam and I were on our own since we came home from hospital. Mark wasn’t able to take much time off the first two weeks after Sam’s birth but we were never on our own from 7am-7pm. By week three my Mom and Sister-in-Law were here and by week four it was Christmas. Week five was a whole week with Mark off work for the holidays and that brings us to the present.

We did pretty well yesterday. The only thing I didn’t accomplish was getting a bath for myself! Ella and Sam were both dressed and fed, I spent time w/ Ella doing projects, managed to get Sam to spend some time on his own without being held. The kitchen was tidy, bottles were washed and sterilised. “Special pancakes” were made and eaten (even by me), lunch was reheated and eaten AND we all went IN THE CAR to our local Tesco where the weekly shop was done and no one cried! Wait, I made cottage pie with ready-made, gluten-free short-cut pastry, potatoes and peas!

When Mark arrived home at 730pm I wanted to crawl into bed! I didn’t, however. We ate dinner as a family and then I ran a bath for Ella and Sam, got Sam dressed in his pyjamas while Mark bathed Ella and then laid down on our bed with Sam. That was about it for us. 9pm, done. I co-slept with Sam in our bed until 1230 when Mark came to bed but Sam didn’t wake up for a bottle until 245am! We had a bottle & nappy change and laid down to sleep around 4am. 730am rolled around way too soon.

I know it may not sound like I’m struggling after one day like that but I am. I’m struggling with feeling like I’m doing enough. I’m struggling with finding any time for myself. I’m struggling with finding time to write my blog much less fulfill my freelance commitments. I NEED to be able to work for financial reasons. I WANT to be able to work for personal reasons. But where do I find the time? Right now I am sitting on my couch in my lounge with the laptop on the couch next to me. Sam is laying on my legs sleeping as he just doesn’t like to sleep on his own! I have my Blackberry and am typing out this post on my WordPress app (may be the way forward) with my little thumbs going at warp speed so I can get this written, edited and published before it’s time for Sam’s next feed.

I also feel, a bit, like the one thing I do well is Sam. He’s doing magnificently and getting bigger. He’s healthy, lovely and well. In the meantime, Mark and I have very little time together, Ella has become a Daddy’s girl (not a bad thing) and I have forgotten how to cook or do much on the domestic front. How do you do it? I’m trying to set myself “baby steps” to get through each day. I nearly didn’t go to Tesco yesterday because I was a bit frightened of taking Ella and Sam in the car for the first time on my own. But I persevered as I needed to just get on with it! And it worked! I won!

Maybe what I need to do is lower my expectations a bit and just count small victories and be satisfied? Maybe I need a professional re-think? Maybe I need to find a new passion? Maybe I need a nap?

I would love to know if you’ve got it all figured out. How do you balance the needs of everyone in the family including yourself? Is it possible at 6 weeks post-delivery to find this balance or am I trying to put the cart before the horse? Feel free to show me the way!

Finding my New Normal

Whew! I’m knackered! Being a mother to two is a lot harder than I anticipated. In fairness, I didn’t know what to anticipate, really. I thought life would carry on just as it had been. In some ways it has but in many ways it has changed dramatically.

We are starting to find our rhythm with regards to going out with TWO instead of ONE. I thank God for the fact that Ella is 3 1/2 because we don’t have to worry about carrying too much for her. We don’t need a change of clothes (or seven), nappies, dummies, pushchairs or blankets. She usually sorts out what she’s bringing (one of her 87 handbags and/or Baby Annabell or another stuffed toy of some sort) so we don’t have to sort much for her. But we are back to preparing a changing bag for every eventuality, forward-thinking to how many bottles/formula we will need and packing that and finally loading Sam into his car seat. Obviously, for those of you who’ve done it, this can take an hour or more. I did some serious foot-stomping yesterday when we were trying to leave the house to be somewhere for 11am. We ended up leaving the house at 11:20 and getting there just after 11:30. I HATE being late.

Next week will be the return to whatever “normal” is going to be. Mark will be going back to work on Tuesday, Ella will be going to school on Wednesday. It’s time to get out of the “I just had a baby” mode and get on with living. I need to start getting myself back into shape (gentle to start mind you…a walk around the village will be the first step), I need to get back to blogging and my freelance/social media work as well. BritMums needs me! Well, I’d like to think so anyway!

Physically, I feel that I am 1/3 of the way back to normal. I’m 5 weeks post-delivery and have made some good progress but also still feel quite odd in my lower-abdominal area. I’m going to the GP to see what’s what today. My fitness level is no where near where I would like it to be but I plan on “slow and steady wins the race”. I’m still living in leggings and loose tops/fleece sweatshirts. Who knows when this fashion faux pas will end?

Mentally I’m still in a bit of a fog. Blogging and social media aren’t even in the “back seat” at the moment…they’re in the boot! Nothing else seems quite as important as my boy and my girl and my hubby. I need to get back in the saddle though and hopefully find a new motivation for blogging besides my lovely family. If you’d like to see more of anything (or less), please let me know!

Emotionally, I have stopped crying at the drop of a hat. I have found, however, that my patience level is much lower. I get frustrated easily and don’t always cope well with that frustration. I’m hoping that by getting back into a “schedule” this will get better. I need to get Sam’s nursery sorted ONCE AND FOR ALL so that we can start to transition into it. As much as I have loved co-sleeping, and we have slept better for it, I feel that it is time to encourage a bit of independence in Sam. Independence from ME as I am the one who tends to virtually EVERYTHING. I love tending to virtually everything but that also has meant that I get virtually no time for me and Sam can’t settle very well without me. We’re going to work on this…any suggestions are more than welcome.

So, Cafe Bebe is open for suggestion and advice. Finding my new normal may be tricky…I need all the help I can get.

The Week According to Sam- Week Four

Week four of Sam’s life has been a busy one. Grandma arrived, Auntie Julie and the cousins arrived and Mummy lost her mind thanks to Christmas and the need to try to be more than she was capable of. Just your average week then!

Thanks to my inability to prepare for Christmas at the best of times, much less four weeks after giving birth, we needed to go out and about into the great, wide world to shop for anything we could find. The week kicked into high gear with a trip to the city Registrar to officially register Sam’s birth and get his birth certificates. This will allow us to get his British passport and start the process for registering Sam’s birth with the US Embassy in London and getting his US passport. It is unfortunate that there isn’t more pomp and circumstance to the Registration “ceremony”…it’s pretty special after all!

Tuesday, Wednesday and Saturday we spent shopping in Peterborough. Sam is the most outstanding shopper that ever was! He falls asleep once in the car seat after a few minutes, we transfer him in his Snugglebundl into the Xplory pushchair and that’s about it for excitement as far as Sam’s concerned. He sleeps until I wake him up to change his nappy and feed him several hours later. Obviously the key to happiness as far as Sam is concerned is rolling transport. I may have to walk many miles in the coming months!

On Thursday we had a mini-Christmas party with Mummy Matters, Little Bean and Beanie Boy. What fun they all had! We can’t wait to have Sam join in on the fun in a few months. Friday was my Day of Meltdown, however. Faced with the prospect of driving my Mom, Ella, Sam and pushchair, etc. into Stamford for the day with it raining, I simply could not cope. Instead, I cried and stayed indoors thus getting nothing accomplished. How fabulous hormones are! But the real question is, how much longer will I be able to use hormones as an excuse?

On Friday night, Mark and I attended his work Christmas dinner at a restaurant in Stamford. It was nice for us to get out as a couple for the first time while my Mom babysat for the kids. I was very twitchy about 3 hours in and we only made it to 3 1/2 hours before heading back home. I was rather pleased to see my boy in the end. Phew! This is an accomplishment though. We didn’t leave Ella for at least the first six months of her life!

The weekend was filled with Christmas preparation and celebration. I got none of my goals accomplished and requested that Mark wrap the presents this year which was a genius plan. I did manage to get some pictures printed off to create presents for the family so that was one box ticked off. The breakfast dish, Muddy Flourless Cake and Rice Krispie treats, however, remain unticked to this day. Hey ho…next year maybe. Ella was thrilled beyond belief with all of the glee of Christmas while Sam remained placid, calm and asleep for a majority of the day. What a good boy! Everyone in the family commented on what a good boy he was. Proud mama moment there then!

We’re looking forward to the next 8 days of having Daddy at home with us and getting a few jobs done with Sam’s nursery. And maybe catching up on some sleep? Is there a better way to end the year?

And now, the week according to Sam- week four…

Sorry to say that I couldn’t resist putting a Santa hat on baby Sam while he slept!

Proud sister Ella with baby Sam at the Register office in Peterborough

This is how much Sam likes his Moses basket. As in, not at all. I’m looking forward to getting Sam’s crib reassembled to see if he feels any differently about that mode for sleeping. Sigh…

A very special Christmas celebration for some very special friends

Mummy tries to multi-task (see laptop in the background) while Sam does his best to distract her. Sigh…

Sam enjoys his Snugglebundl in his Xplory while Mummy, Daddy, Ella and Grandma tire out their feet with all of the walking and shopping

Daddy and his boy enjoying some quality time during Sam’s First Christmas at Nanny and Grandad’s

Another week of Sam amazing and delighting us, another week of Ella being an outstanding Big Sister and more excitement to look forward to in 2012.

Merry Christmas from Cafe Bebe

We are very blessed this year to have our precious Sam join our wee Cafe Bebe family. This will be Sam’s FIRST Christmas and while he’ll never remember a bit of it, we’ll all be celebrating his safe arrival and getting in loads of cuddles.

Ella is thrilled to bits and beyond excited about this Christmas. The only challenge we had this evening, after putting her to bed, was her fear that Santa would come into her room. She needed plenty of reassuring that he could leave the presents without coming anywhere near her. Then she was satisfied. I can’t wait to hear her exclamations and comments tomorrow. I must remember to write them down.

Mark and I have had a pretty wonderful year, culminating with the safe arrival of our son Sam on 24 November (American Thanksgiving). We are grateful for every opportunity and gift that has come our way this year and never forget how lucky we are to be together.

I’d like to thank any and everyone who has managed to stop by Cafe Bebe in this, my second full year of blogging. The year has had its highs and lows from a blogging perspective but I am so pleased to have made it through another year with still more challenges ahead of me. I hope that you will continue to pop by Cafe Bebe from time to time (if not regularly) in 2012 to see what new adventures we get up to. I’ll try not to annoy you too much with endless pictures of my children or rant too much about too little. Stick with me though…I’m sure there will be a few good things to read about along the way.

Happy Christmas to all and to all a Rockin’ New Year!

Love,

Karin, Mark, Ella and Sam

Flashback Friday- 4 weeks ago

Today is a very short Flashback Friday to celebrate what occurred 4 weeks ago. 4 weeks ago yesterday our precious Sam joined the world and our Cafe Bebe family. What a wonderful addition to our lives he has been.

Thank you for bringing so much joy to our family little Sam. We all love you so!

Happy Christmas to all and to all a wonderful holiday week!

The Week According to Sam- Week Three

Week three finds us settling into a teeny bit of a routine with much more regular feeding of about 3-4 hours and slightly larger feeds thanks to a formula change. We have had several minor “poonami’s” which also tell us that Sam’s formula is working properly now. The boy is starting to stay awake a bit longer at a stretch now which means that we are getting to see more expressions on his lovely face and have even witnessed a smile or two!

Grandma (my Mom) arrived on Wednesday from America. We all journeyed down to Heathrow to collect Grandma and had a very successful trip in the car with long sleeps both ways. Thank goodness! It’s been lovely having Sam be held by his Grandma and I know she appreciates the opportunity to get to know her grandson. Also arriving this week, Mark’s twin sister Julie and her 3 children from Australia. We’re thrilled to have them with us this Christmas as it will be a year or more until we see them all again. Family….ahhhhh!

Thanks to remaining relatively house-bound, due to not driving, we have virtually NO Christmas shopping done and are living meal to meal. I’m going to try to remedy that today but am feeling rather uninspired by the festive season. Our tree is finally decorated, however, and there are assorted lights around the house which help to make the mood more jolly. This weekend will be Sam’s first Christmas! I need to get in the mood!

Here is the week according to Sam in pictures…enjoy!

Sisterly love…Ella still loves “My Baby” and has yet to act put out or tempermental about Sam’s presence, thank God!

Daddy, Ella and a VERY ANGRY Sam testing out the glider in what will be Sam’s room in a week or so! Yes, I know, we still have to finish Sam’s nursery…*head, desk*

Ooh, look! An illusive picture of Sam and Mummy! Wonder of wonders! I realised that 3 weeks have gone by without ONE picture of Sam and Mummy. I have to try harder to do better with this!

Sam’s favourite napping place. The addition of a Snooze Shade has allowed Sam to have a few slightly longer naps. One day we may actually sleep in our Moses Basket. Maybe when we’re 3 years old!

Baby FEET! Who doesn’t love Baby FEET! I could just eat them right up! We really need to get some newborn socks now…poor Sam, he has virtually none!

“Power to the People” or is it “Power to the Bebe”

And just look at that adorable chin!

Quality time with Grandma…awwww!

Another week down and more lessons learned. The biggest lesson learned is that Sam LOVES to be held. Particularly by Mummy. Particularly at night. All night. I’m struggling with this a bit as I know he needs to feel secure without me. I know I need to put him down more. I have shed many a tear over my conflict with this. Sam is my last baby. These are early days. Shouldn’t I cuddle him and snuggle him as much as we like? But then, I can’t do anything BUT. Sigh. This week I’ll be attempting to use the Moby sling I have been lent from Muddling Along Mummy. We’ll see how we get on and if I get my hands back. Any suggestions are more than welcome.

Giving co-sleeping a try

Sam is 2 1/2 weeks old and is a very chilled out, accomodating baby. He has fit right into our family and rolled with the punches. Granted, there haven’t been many punches as we’ve not been out of the house too much thanks to me and my house arrest but whatever we do, he rolls right with us.

One of the joys of having a newborn is taking advantage of those newborn cuddle opportunities. Sam simply adores being held. After a bottle he will now stay awake for a teeny bit and then, snuggled on my chest (or hubby’s) will happily doze for 2+ hours. I am able to transfer him, usually, to his pushchair for a bit of free time and he will often sleep there for 30-45 minutes which allows me to get a few things done. But ultimately, where Sam wants to be is with his Mummy or his Daddy. Take that Gina Ford!

I know that these moments will be few and far between in a short time so, as Sam will be our last child, I don’t want to miss out. Plus, due to my c-section recovery, taking advantage of holding Sam and catching cat-naps is just what the doctor ordered. Now, thanks to this routine, Sam just is not overly keen on sleeping on his own, particularly at night. We’ve had the Moses basket in our room (and the Xplory seat on the Moses basket frame) but it’s a bit too OPEN a space for Sam. He settles momentarily and then whammo, is awake and wanting to be held. This means that Mummy gets maybe 20 minutes of sleep at a time. This makes Mummy unhappy, grouchy and unneccessarily emotional. This is not good for the family.

So, we are giving co-sleeping a try! I never thought I would be sharing a bed with my baby (yes, I know all of the risks and dangers and rest assured, we are taking all precautions) but what ends up happening when Sam sleeps with us (well, really, with me) is that Sam sleeps. This means that Mummy sleeps. This is a very good thing indeed. Sam sleeps right next to me, cuddled right into me and is out. We usually get a 3 hour sleep for the first part of the night, wake for a bottle and then often get a 4-5 hour sleep for the 2nd part of the night. 7:30am is now our usual waking time. This is a very good thing. For everyone.

Many people might not understand co-sleeping. I considered it something that only “Earth Mothers” would do and I most definitely am not an Earth Mother. But, we are following a Sam-Centered approach and this is what works for Sam. It’s quite different to what worked for Ella. Ella settled pretty well into her Moses Basket, stayed there for the first 4 weeks and then transitioned to her cot. We occasionally brought her into bed with us (and still do) but did not co-sleep. My intention is not necessarily to be co-sleeping for months or years but to gradually transition Sam to his cot/crib for daytime naps (when we actually get it set up!) and then to reclaim our bed. I love having Sam near me. It works for both of us. We aren’t breastfeeding so some might think that it’s pointless but I find that Sam’s sleep is much better when we sleep together. That makes me happy and it makes Sam happy. Happy baby = Happy Mummy = Happy Family. Sorted.

What do you think to co-sleeping? Do you do it? Would you do it? What have you done differently from first to second child? I’d love to hear your stories.

The Week According to Sam- Week Two

It’s hard to believe that ONLY two weeks have gone by. Already I can’t imagine our lives without Sam and my stay prior to his delivery on 24 November seems about 8 billion years ago. But no, in fact, it was only 18 days ago. This is probably why I seem to think I can do everything I used to do and why my body is doing it’s best to tell me otherwise. Poo.

Sam has settled right into our family perfectly. He is a very chilled baby for the most part, unless it’s time for a bottle. Then he shouts for England. Oh, he does do the same when he gets his nappy changed as well. Crikey! Honestly, the boy gets FURIOUS with me! Sam is still doing a LOT of sleeping and mostly on me as I am well and truly spoiling him with loads and loads of Mummy cuddle time. Take that Gina Ford! Of course, as a result, I get very little sleep myself but hey ho, I wasn’t going to win Yummy Mummy of the Year this year anyway. Maybe next year?

We changed Sam’s formula this week as he still wasn’t pooing properly. We had a minor “poonami” on Friday and it appears that we are getting to what normal newborn poo should be like (you wanted to know that right?). I am still waiting for the “up the back and hose ‘em down” sort of poo-splosion so I’ll have to keep you posted on that one. As Daddy went back to work this week, we’ve been forced to stay at home most of the week. I’m going a bit stir-crazy but the holidays are soon here and family are arriving this week which will help. We had a lovely family outing on Sunday to get our Christmas Tree. Even though Sam had no clue whatsoever, it was very special to have the four of us out there picking the perfect tree.

The following are pictures from the week according to Sam from the 2nd week of his life. You’ll notice a similar theme in most of the pictures…eyes closed and blissfully asleep. I can assure you that Sam does indeed open his eyes from time to time and they are, in fact, blue.

Mummy, Ella and Sam from our favourite place…the couch!

Sam’s favourite place to sleep (after Mummy’s chest)…his Xplory pushchair!

Ella’s got a “dummy buddy” now. Green means go, Red means STOP!

Artsy-fartsy photo of Mummy’s hand holding Sam’s. Aw….

Sam is exceptionally good at frowning and has his Mummy’s (and Ella’s) pout. Big time!

I don’t care what anyone says, Sam was well & truly smiling…it was not gas! Mind you, he is sleeping…

It’s been a long, hard week for Daddy and his boy. Time for Daddy cuddles…

There we have the week according to Sam. This week there will be Christmas decorations, outings with our best mates @MummyMatters & Beanie Boy, arrivals from Grandma Kathy and Auntie Julie and loads more fun. And of course, plenty of Mummy cuddles. Happy Holidays everyone…thanks for indulging my adoration for the Cafe Bebe offspring…

Lessons Learned after 13 days as a 2nd time Mum

Well, here we are. Sam will be two weeks old tomorrow however TODAY is his actual, original due date. We’ve had an amazing two+ weeks and are starting to get used to life as a family of four. I wrote a post a while back entitled, Am I insane to think life won’t change much?. Everyone was quite polite in suggesting that we’d find our way and settle into a routine, etc, etc, etc. The real problem I managed to forget about was the fact that I would be recovering from a c-section. Minor issue…not. So here are some of the lessons I have learned after 13 days as a 2nd time Mum:

  • It is indeed possible to love your 2nd child as much as your first. From the minute I looked into Sam’s little eyes, I was totally in love. That rubbish about not bonding with your baby post-c-section? Just that, rubbish.
  • Sleep is over-rated but necessary. I still haven’t caught up on it. It is amusing how pleased you can be when you get 2-3 hours of solid sleep. Or how you consider it a small victory if you can catch a nap during the day time. No wonder sleep deprivation is a form of torture in prisoner-of-war situations. You know you’re a little too far gone when you can’t quite remember the name of your newest child or when you call him “Sid” (Hubby). As long as you can laugh about it though…
  • Poo is exceptionally important. From your baby. When they aren’t pooing. One should also trust one’s instinct and not that of your crap community midwife when one thinks that maybe changing formula is a good idea due to the fact that your son is not pooing like a rock star. Also, it is possible to do a happy dance over the weaniest bit of poo and notify friends and family about it. You could only appreciate this if you are a parent.
  • In regards to poo, it is fun to come up with new words in anticipation of the giant poo you’re hoping to see: poonami, poosaster, pooicane, poomaggedon, thunderpoo, poosplosion…feel free to add your own!
  • As much as your first born adores her sibling, the change that the new baby brings into your lives is difficult. Expect tantrums, tears and whinging. This only lasts for a few days (in the best cases) but it will, indeed happen.
  • When your body tells you to slow down, you really should listen to it. This is particularly appropriate when you are recovering from a c-section. You must remember: you have just had MAJOR abdominal surgery. You will get no awards for bravery and in fact, will hamper your recovery if you push it. The floor does not need mopping (on hands and knees even which I may or may not have done), it is not a contest to see how many things you can tick off as accomplishments. If you can manage to get all people dressed you have achieved enough.
  • People kind of forget that you need looking in on/after with a 2nd pregnancy. I think most people assume that since you’ve “been there, done that” you won’t need as much attention/care. We only received a handful of “Congratulations” cards and a few (albeit lovely and very much appreciated) presents for Sam. Not a single bouquet arrived for me (yes, I know I sound whingey). The sooner you lower your expectations regarding attention and pressies in a 2nd pregnancy, the better.
  • If you can make arrangements to have meals in the freezer or a family member to make a few meals for you to have on offer, great! You simply will not feel like cooking or baking. Pick up some ready-meals if necessary or make double portions of Cottage Pie or Bolognaise sauce to freeze. Also, MOST DEFINITELY sort out online grocery delivery BEFORE your delivery date. The sooner you have orders established the better. I am suffering from NOT having done this ahead of time. Hubby keeps popping to the store to pick up bits and bobs which is costing us more than a proper shop. It is my goal to get this sorted FINALLY this week.
  • There’s nothing quite so precious as newborn cuddles. It is not possible to spoil your baby. You probably will suffer from greater sleep deprivation if you spend most of your time with your baby sleeping on your chest but this is a small price to pay. You will NEVER get these moments back. Cherish them, take advantage of them. When they are running to get away from you in a few years you will have these memories to look back on.
  • BREATHE. When your 3 1/2 year old is pushing the boundaries and wanting and needing your attention while you are holding the baby and trying to get dinner ready, stop and BREATHE. Don’t take it out on your toddler. Take the time to understand what they are going through and give them the attention they deserve as well.
  • It is possible to turn your “Mummy’s Girl” into a “Daddy’s Girl” in a short space of time. Due to my hospital stay prior to having Sam and Mark’s days off last week, Ella has well and truly become Daddy’s girl. Mark has been the one she calls for now; Mark does her bedtime routine; Mark is who she’s had to turn to. And this is a very good thing indeed. Ella was FAR too dependent on me and she needed to NEED her Daddy more. I know he is grateful for this new relationship with his daughter. And it gives me more time with Sam in these early days as well. I know we will need to work to balance our time with both children but for now, this is a great bonus.
  • Blogging, social media and an online presence becomes FAR less important the minute a teeny, gorgeous baby enters your life. I have managed to go several days without opening the laptop! I have taken a bit of “maternity leave” from BritMums (fear ye not, I’ll be back!) and have realised that the most important thing is these three people under my roof. This is one of the best lessons I have learned and one that everyone else needs to remember. What is my line? “STEP AWAY FROM THE LAPTOP!” Enjoy your family, enjoy the holidays and enjoy yourself. Life’s too short to be wasted.

Now, it’s time for me to get back to my son and work on creating that poonami we’re hoping for!