Bebe

Cafe Bebe Loves…Snugglebundl

Posted by cafebebemama on Feb 17, 2012 in Bebe, Blogging, Product Reviews | 0 comments

When I was laying in hospital, awaiting Sam’s birth, Twitter was a lifeline to me. It kept me busy and boosted my spirits. While on Twitter, a tweet came through from Snugglebundl (@snugglebundl). They were looking for pregnant mummy bloggers who were interested in reviewing their new product. They were ideally looking for a mum having a c-section as the Snugglebundl is extra helpful for mums recovering from c-sections. What do you know? I fit both of those criteria! The lovely people behind Snugglebundl sent me my very own Snugglebundl just like that!

Sam has been happily ensconced in his rainbow striped Snugglebundl and I tell you what…we would not be without it, that’s for sure. In fact, hands down, it is my favourite new baby product this time around! It’s so soft and snuggly (hence the name) and keeps Sam in the perfect state to sleep and be comfortable. Sam is a baby who needs a lot of cuddles so the Snugglebundl has allowed me to make virtually any environment safe and warm for him.

We use the Snugglebundl in Sam’s infant car seat which is ideal in this winter weather. The Snugglebundl means that I don’t have to stuff Sam into a snow suit or winter coat which would make his car seat less effective. Instead, I place the Snugglebundl in the car seat, place Sam in the Snugglebundl and cinch him in. He’s covered, snug, cosy and safe all at the same time. I love the “hat” feature at the top of the Snugglebundl as well. It keeps Sam’s head covered without being too hot or uncomfortable.

We’ve also used Sam’s Snugglebundl when putting Sam in his Xplory. There’s a lovely footmuff in the Xplory but the Snugglebundl allows us to extricate Sam from his car seat without disturbing him and then we can transfer him to the Xplory and keep him protected and warm. It was the perfect solution for me in my c-section recovery as well. I could simply put the handles together and lift Sam easily out of the car seat and/or pushchair and not strain myself in the process. We even used the Snugglebundl as a hammock-like sling to gently swing Sam to comfort him when he was stressed out.

I can wholeheartedly recommend the Snugglebundl for any expectant parents. It’s lovely and fleecy, soft and snuggly and the perfect solution for just about any situation. Car seat, pushchair, Moses basket, cot, public changing tables…you name it! You can order the Snugglebundl directly from their site for £39.99. I actually would like to have a 2nd Snugglebundl for when one is in the wash!

Sam gives the Snugglebundl a mahoosive THUMBS UP! Go get one now…you won’t regret it!

**Disclosure: We received the Snugglebundl for review purposes. The words and opinions about the product are mine alone!**

Coping

Posted by cafebebemama on Feb 7, 2012 in Bebe, Motherhood | 0 comments

It’s been ten weeks so far. Ten weeks since Sam brightened our days and joined our happy family. It’s been ten weeks of learning and ten weeks of coping. I’m learning that I’m not coping all that well, to be honest. I have learned that I am not strong. I’m pretty weak when it comes right down to it and I’m pretty quiet about that weakness as well.

We want everyone to think that we are fine? Why shouldn’t I be fine? I have a healthy, growing, lovely baby boy who is precious and wonderful. I have a fantastically independent, clever and vocal daughter who makes me smile and my heart swell with pride every day. I have a lovely husband for whom I crossed an ocean to find and who makes me happier than I ever thought possible. I should be fine.

In many ways I am fine but I’m lonely. As much as I adore Sam, I’m finding the 24/7 draining yet the idea of separating from him is difficult as well. Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays Ella is in preschool for 6 hours. I am grateful for that time. Ella is stimulated, educated and entertained by someone other than me, I get six hours to spend with Sam and try to get my work done. I love those 6 hours BUT I also find them very lonely. The house is quiet (except for This Morning on the telly from 10:30-12:30) which seems to emphasize the loneliness. I could get out of the house but when you have no one to go out with, that prospect isn’t very inspiring. I also let things get to me. I seem to blow small things out of proportion and let them affect me more than they should, particularly with regard to my work.

I know I need to get out more. I know I need to exercise more and do things for me to make me feel good. But when you have a ten week old baby, that’s easier said than done. I thought this would be so easy. Everyone else seems to just roll with it and get on. Why shouldn’t I? The other day my inlaws stopped by for a visit. I was dressed in my usual uniform these days…leggings, loose t-shirt, hair scraped back with a headband because I desperately need a haircut but can’t take the time to make an appointment and no makeup. Sam was just about to go to sleep after an early evening bottle but with the arrival of Nanny & Grandad that went out the window and he quickly got overtired and irritable. I was short-tempered and frustrated with Ella who was whirling and twirling about because Nanny and Grandad were there. My mother-in-law asked me “What have you done today?” (in a very nice & making small talk kind of way) and I thought about it and stared at her. I had no idea what I had done all day.

Ella had been at school for her usual shift, I had managed to get the kids dressed and fed and the kitchen was clean with the dishwasher unloaded. I had done a couple of blog posts and done my freelance social media work. I had eaten lunch. But what had I ACCOMPLISHED??? In the eyes of my mother-in-law, probably not much! The shelves needed to be dusted, the carpet needed to be vacuumed, there was a pile of laundry on the table that needed to be folded. The bed linens really could have stood to be changed and the bathroom could have used a good scrub. Sam’s room was still in a state of disarray and there were a million other little projects that I could have done. But I couldn’t find anything to say to my mother-in-law. I just looked at her and said “Um, well, not much”. I didn’t even have dinner started. I didn’t even know what I was supposed to be making for dinner.

I’m not really sure what I need to do. I think I maybe have the “baby blues” and could use some help. Unfortunately, I have very little faith in the GP’s and Health Visitors at my surgery so I don’t really have a medical person to confide in. Perhaps I just need to go in and speak to someone, regardless? Maybe I just need a happy pill to take some of the “blah” out of me because that’s what I feel like right now. Blah. Are there happy pills to take the blah away?

This motherhood thing? Not so easy after all!

Sam- His Birth Story, Part One

Posted by cafebebemama on Feb 4, 2012 in Bebe, Motherhood | 0 comments

If you hadn’t been keeping up on Twitter, I went into hospital on Monday 21 November after noticing some light spotting bleeding. I had placenta praevia and our elective c-section had been scheduled for Friday 2 December. I was adamant, in the meeting with the consultant, that I wanted an elective c-section. Ella’s emergency c-section after failure to progress in labour was traumatic and terrifically unpleasant. I wanted to have a controlled, semi-peaceful birth and was confident that an elective c-section, while stil MAJOR abdominal surgery, would be the best for all of us. I was also adamant that if I went into labour early, I still wanted an elective c-section. Thankfully, the placenta praevia necessitated that.

On Monday 21 November, one week after turning 41, I went to the toilet around noon for a routine wee and noticed some spotting. My heart skipped a beat. It wasn’t bright red bleeding but it definitely was spotting. I waited for a bit, checked again and was assured that it was continuing. I phoned Mark first to tell him and told him that I would be ringing the hospital labour ward. After I rang the maternity unit, they told me that I definitely needed to come in. Panic stations!

I wasn’t packed and the hospital bag that I had started for the baby was only partially ready. I rang Mark back to tell him to come home, had a quick bath & got dressed, packed the baby’s bag, packed my bag and waited for Mark to come home. We had Ella with us as it was a non-school day. We didn’t want to ring Mark’s parents to worry them nor did we really have time to drop Ella off at their house. All three of us journeyed the 15 minutes or so to Peterborough City Hospital. We had been instructed to go to the Maternity Triage area where they would handle us. We arrived in the waiting area at 1:45pm and thus began my stay in hospital. I wouldn’t leave, in the end, for 5 more days. I hadn’t packed for that! I thought, silly my, that I might be having our baby on Monday 21 November. Everyone else had different plans.

Eventually I was taken through to be examined. We had rung Mark’s parents and asked them to come to the hospital to collect Ella as we weren’t sure how long we’d be there. Ella was bored and wiggly so Mark took her down to the lobby get some treats and shortly after they left I was called back to the exam room. After checking me, they determined that it seemed to be an “old” bleed but they were still concerned enough to admit me. At that point I was given the first of two steroid injections to help Bebe’s lungs to mature should he or she decide to be born early. At this point I was 37 weeks + 5 with a scheduled elective c-section for the following Friday at 39 weeks + 2. It was during my time in triage that Mark brought Ella back up to say goodbye to me which made me cry. I didn’t know what was happening and my daughter was leaving me…it really was hard for me.

I was then tranferred onto the Maternity Services Ward. This is the place where women being induced or checked for ante-natal problems are sent. Also, this is the post-delivery ward in Peterborough City Hospital. Thankfully, the hospital being just a year old meant that everything was nice and shiny and clean. The wards were HUGE with 4 beds and plenty of room around each bed. We were even afforded the luxury of a television, albeit, without freeview or satellite! There was one large toilet/shower room for the 4 berths to share which was far better than when I had to schlep myself down the hallway to a communal toilet when I was in the old hospital for Ella’s labour and delivery.

I shared the ward with a slightly chavvy girl who was being monitored (and later turfed), a diabetic woman at 34 weeks pregnant who was refusing to eat and/or take her medication and a woman being induced and beginning to labour across from me. When I was admitted, no one really explained anything to me. The midwife on shift told me that I would be seen by the consultant in the morning. That was it. No explanation of how long I might be staying or what I could expect. Mark stayed with me for a short while but I felt it was more important that he collect Ella and take her home so she could have a normal night in our house. He went to his parents to collect her and then brought Ella back to see me. We had a nice but short visit and then when it came time to say goodbye, Ella grabbed onto me and sobbed. Poor thing, she didn’t understand why her Mummy couldn’t come home with her. We’d really never been separated with the exception of 2 nights apart in her whole life. We both cried and then Mark peeled Ella off of me and bundled her into the car to go home. Bless her, she fell asleep in the car on the way home.

Thankfully, there were no restrictions on mobile phone usage and I had had the presence of mind to pack my BlackBerry charger so I was able to Tweet and email everyone to give updates. I also managed to write, over the next 3 days, 3 blog posts with my two little thumbs tippy-tapping away. A miracle! The next morning (Tuesday) a rather horrid and totally unfeeling, thoughtless Consultant rolled up, reviewed my chart, said I would be staying at least another day and night and that was it. No discussion about anything. No questions. No niceties or anything. I was left staring open-mouthed as he turned on his heel and went to the next bed. Thus began the pattern for the next 3 days. The consultant would roll up in the morning at some point, look at my chart, tell me I was staying and leave. Each day I wondered when I would be allowed to go home. Each day, no one filled in that answer. Finally, one afternoon, I think Wednesday, one of the midwives finally said, “More than likely they’ll keep you here until your scheduled elective c-section.”

Thanks to the placenta praevia and the fact that I had had a light bleed, there was no telling if or when a proper bleed might start. The danger, with placenta praevia, is that if a major bleed starts, it happens FAST with very little time to get help and the result could be death. The doctors at PCH didn’t want to risk me leaving hospital and having a major bleed. Totally understandable. But it really didn’t help that this wasn’t properly communicated to me until I was in hospital for 3 days. I also wanted to discuss moving up the date of the elective c-section. It seemed to me that keeping me in hospital for 11 days was far more expensive and pointless than moving up the date of the c-section, especially considering that by the Wednesday I was 38 weeks pregnant and had had my 2 steroid injections as well. The consultants wouldn’t even discuss it. They gave me answers like “statistics”, “reports”, “studies” and said it was best to wait as long as possible and get to 39 weeks. I argued that if I went into labour and/or had a bleed then the elective c-section which was scheduled for 2 December would then become an emergency and/or crash c-section, potentially under general anaesthetic which could be far worse for myself and the baby. They didn’t listen. They were aiming for 39 weeks. I was stuck. I was depressed.

Mark and Ella were having to fend for themselves, I was lonely and depressed and all I wanted was to hold my baby. The lunatic in the bed next to me was driving me to distraction and I had nothing to do. It was not a good thing. I honestly don’t know how women who have to be in for much longer manage. Part of my difficulty was that no one was telling me anything until Thursday. Finally on Thursday, the same humourless consultant who I had seen on Tuesday told me that there was no chance I was getting out and that I would just have to wait until the following Friday for my scheduled elective c-section. I sobbed. He stared at me. He said nothing but just stood there and stared at me. Finally he backed out of the bay and left me sobbing. The midwife came over to me and wrapped her arms around me and just patted my back while I sobbed. I just wanted to go home. She brought me some tissues and left me in peace. I curled up in a ball on my bed and was miserable.

I spent the rest of the day sitting up in a chair, watching telly, pouting miserably and checking Twitter. Then, around 3:30pm my comfort midwife came in and asked if I had been put on the monitor yet that day. I hadn’t so she wheeled in the machine, strapped me up and started monitoring me. As the minutes ticked on, I began to feel “tightenings” in my belly. I started looking at the monitor each time they started and watched the numbers go up and up. They started to be more than “discomfort” and became properly uncomfortable. My spotting had picked up a bit that afternoon and now with the “tightenings” starting, I began to wonder if Bebe was planning on an earlier entrance. It was Thanksgiving in America after all. It seemed fitting!

The midwife came around to check the tape and was shocked to see all the spikes and dips in my feed. She asked me if I could feel the contractions. I said yes. She said, “Well, we’ll keep you on the monitor for a while longer then.” About 30 minutes later, after continued tightenings and definite “discomfort”, the midwife came back. She didn’t like the frequency of the “tightenings” and called in one of the junior consultants to look at the tape. They decided that it was time to bring in the consultant to have a look. Then, after a few more minutes, they decided to transfer me to the labour ward. It was about 5:30 by this time. I rang Mark and told him to get to the hospital as I was being moved to the labour ward which scared the bejesus out of him. The midwife and junior consultant brought a wheelchair around and started packing up my things to transfer me to the labour ward. It seemed that Bebe indeed wanted to be a Thanksgiving baby.

Next installment: Labour ward, Arterial Bleeding and the C-Section…

#adayinthelife Thursday 19 January

Posted by cafebebemama on Jan 20, 2012 in Bebe, Motherhood | 2 comments

Early this morning, a fellow blogger of distinction began Tweeting #adayinthelife with rather dull invigorating tweets about his day. I suggested that we should start a trend and see who else wanted to join us. As far as I know, Tim & I were the only bloggers to take up the challenge. Aren’t we trend setters? Anyhoo, here’s #adayinthelife Thursday 19 January for the Cafe Bebe family. Hold onto your hats!

8:00am- Enjoying a cuddle with Sam. Contemplating the day ahead with enthusiasm lacking.

8:38am- Ella, ready for school, is doing her “homework” while watching Lazy Town. Just like her mother…

8:45am- Another cup of tea, gone cold, without finishing it. Such is the curse of motherhood.

9:10am- Time for the school run for Ella. Doesn’t she look cheerful?

10:00am- Looking for happiness in the pages of my cookbooks. Several recipes look brilliant. Unfortunately I seem to be missing some key ingredients!

10:30am- Giving Sam a bit of “space” by letting him play in the bouncy chair. This lasts approximately 8 minutes.

10:50am- Elevenses for an 8 week old! Everyone raise a bottle for Baby Sam who is today, 2 months old. How did that happen?

11:30am- Giving gNappies a go. Aren’t they cute?

11:45am- The gNappies are prepared for use today. The first nappy change 4 hours later is surprisingly positive. The poopy nappy change approximately 30 minutes after that is less thrilling!

12:15pm- An attempt at a nap for Sam in his cot in his room. Partial swaddling is in place (he wrangles his arms out no matter what!), positioning is set and Ewan the Sheep is set to white noise. The nap lasts altogether about an hour and 10 minutes but Sam doesn’t sleep the entire time. I take approximately 8 trips up and down the stairs to settle and calm him. Fun times!

1:45pm- More bouncy chair time…Sam looks rather serious.

3:45pm- Having collected Ella from school, there’s a bit of time for a cuddle, another bottle and then we’re off to Nanny and Grandad’s for dinner.

And thus, our #adayinthelife comes to an end…in pictures anyway. So how was your Thursday? If you feel like joining in next week and I can remember, try to join in on #adayinthelife next week. Let’s hope your day was a bit more exciting than ours!

Conflicted over Co-Sleeping

Posted by cafebebemama on Jan 11, 2012 in Bebe, Motherhood | 9 comments

I have a very snuggly baby boy. He adores being held and I indulge that pretty much all of the time. I wrote a post a few weeks ago called Giving Co-Sleeping a Try. Sam has taken to co-sleeping like a duck to water. We lay down on our sides, facing each other and he snuggles right into me and sleeps SOLID for up to 4-5 hours! I sleep as well! I’ve never been a good sleeper…I sleep very lightly so everything wakes me up. But, fortunately, with Sam next to me, I do manage to sleep and feel rested when woken up for a 3am feed or 7am feed. Co-sleeping definitely has its benefits!

My challenge, however, is that Sam needs holding pretty much all of the time. He’s become more attached to me (physically) than ever and while I adore it and don’t believe in the “Gina Ford” method, it does make getting things done tricky. We now have a Baby Bjorn carrier which really suits us both. The last two mornings I have worn it to take Ella to school and then Sam and I have gone for our morning walk around the village. He falls asleep and when we get home, I have continued to “wear” Sam in the carrier for an hour or more while he sleeps. I’ve been able to eat breakfast, type posts, reply to emails and even tidy the kitchen while “wearing” Sam.

What I am worried about is that Sam is becoming unable to soothe himself without being near/on me. I want to be able to put him down and let him “play” without having to hold him or hover over him all of the time. Don’t get me wrong, however. I am not wanting to “get rid” of Sam, I am just wanting him to be confident without me. I know I may be asking a lot of a 6 week old so I need some “expert” opinion on whether I am expecting too much.

What I would like to accomplish is to get Sam used to being put down in his Moses Basket and spending some time, during the day, for naps. He’s never been particularly keen on his Moses Basket so we may have an uphill battle here. I know all of the tips for success:

• Hot water bottle in the Moses Basket to warm it before putting him down
• A shirt or cloth that I have worn, with my “scent” to comfort him
• Swaddling
• Fully darkened room
• Put him down somewhat awake so he can learn to go to sleep himself

Can anyone recommend anything else? Something you’ve tried that worked? I know I probably have to toughen up and just bite the bullet. What I don’t want is for ME to be the only person who can soothe Sam. While I am his primary, pretty much exclusive caregiver at the moment, he should be able to go to his Daddy or Nanny without putting up too much of a fuss. I should be able to go to the bathroom without wearing Sam. Or sit at the laptop without rocking! Again, am I expecting too much of a 6 week old? It’s been so long since Ella was at this stage! I’ve forgotten.

I have adored co-sleeping. Sam sleeps so well and it’s really lovely actually. But, I would like to be able to go to bed when I want to go to bed. I would like to claim my bed back for Mark and myself. I appreciate our good sleep pattern that we have developed and I know that when Sam is on his own in his nursery (Moses Basket or Crib), I will be getting up and have much more broken sleep. But I feel conflicted over co-sleeping right now. Even though it’s working well for us, I still have these concerns.

Thoughts? Opinions? Commiserations? Tell me off?

The Week According to Sam- Week Five

Posted by cafebebemama on Jan 8, 2012 in Bebe, Little Miss Adventures, Motherhood, Uncategorized, Week According to Sam | 0 comments

Week FIVE?? How did we get to week five with me still partially SANE? Having survived Christmas as well, I think that’s not half bad. The week according to Sam this week included the family we so looked forward to visiting, leaving us. Grandma left on Tuesday and Auntie Julie and the cousins left on Friday. Thankfully Auntie Julie and the family will be back for one night before heading back to Australia, however. We don’t know when we’ll possibly see them again for a long while so we’re very much looking forward to this last upcoming visit.

In addition to having to say goodbye to family, we had some other fun family adventures while Daddy enjoyed some much needed (and deserved) holiday from work. Mid-week, we had a wonderful family photo shoot at a local photo studio. Despite our best intentions to leave the house with plenty of time to arrive, we ended up being 30 minutes late and my last shred of patience was obliterated. We were rushed through our shoot and while we did end up with some lovely images and the whole family was very beautifully immortalised, we just didn’t get enough time to get some of the shots I wanted. Hey-ho…we’ll just have to go again.

Sam continues to grow, change and develop. We’re even getting proper SMILES now! It takes some coaxing (and is usually brought on by Mummy’s voice) but they are REAL and not just wind. Sam is also staying awake longer after feeds and settling into a teeny bit of a routine. We are still co-sleeping but are also weaning a bit by having Sam sleep a few hours in his Fisher Price Cruisin’ Motion Soother which makes Mummy and Daddy happy too.

Here we have the week according to Sam- week five, in pictures…

Grandma gets one more evening to spend with Sam. Sam is suitably soothed and chilled at the same time!

Time for one last photo with Grandma and the kids before Grandma flies back to the US. We’ll miss you Grandma…hope to come visit YOU this summer!

Wonder of wonders! A picture with Sam and ME! Of course, taken by my fair hand…again! But still, a lovely moment with me and my boy.

A nice little cuddle with Daddy. Sam seems to be staring at the picture on Mark’s shirt…or wondering whether to poop! Could be either or both!

Told you! He’s smiling! We had a series of several smiles while Nanny held Sam. A real treat for Nanny and one I managed to capture on camera!

New Year’s Eve…and all is quiet! One of those rare moments. Shhhh…

We’ll start the year as we mean to go on, shall we? Loves and kisses anyone?

Next week we’re back to normal…Daddy back to work…Ella back to school…Mummy freaking out! What will happen in the end…God only knows!