Yesterday I had my last meeting with the Health Visitor. I had had two meetings previously, in my house. We chatted about things I was struggling with, things I was over-coming and how to cope. She was actually really helpful, encouraging and talkative. On the first meeting I was really nervous, thinking that she would be evaluating me, the kitchen, Sam’s well-being and the cleanliness of the house. I furiously cleaned, organised and sorted and came very close to cancelling the meeting.
I kept the meeting in the end and was grateful for it, ultimately. If she was “evaluating” me, Sam and the house, she at least covered it well. Knowing I had the meetings with the Health Visitor forced me to keep taking my “baby steps”, to make and keep GP appointments and have progress to report. I felt like she was a cheerleader too, making me see why I may have dipped into post-natal depression and applauding some of my small victories. She commended my bond with Sam and his health and happiness which made me feel wonderful. The one thing I have never struggled with is my bond with Sam and my knowledge that at least I was a good Mummy to Sam.
Our meeting yesterday was much like the other two. I welcomed the Health Visitor in but invited her into the lounge for the first time. I have had a renewed interest in cleaning and organising and the lounge was looking pretty good so I thought I would show it off. I put Sam in his walker and we chatted about what had happened over the past four weeks. I am feeling so much stronger, happier and able to cope which I communicated to the Health Visitor. She said something then which I struggled to understand a bit due to her accent (Eastern European) and quick speech. She said “You’re feeling a bit more Jan”. I sort of glossed over that as I wasn’t sure what I heard.
I continued reporting on my state of mind and my concerns about my physical self and queried what I should do about that. She encouraged me to go back to the GP to discuss my umbilical hernia and significant abdominal separation and get something done about it. The Health Visitor asked me then if I wanted to meet again and I said that I actually felt strong enough to stop the home visits as if I needed help and support I would get in touch and do so quickly. She was happy with that and then stood up and said “Well, Janice, I am really pleased that you’re feeling so well. You’ve come a long way. Well done”.
Eh? Who’s Janice? She thought my name was JANICE. My name is so not Janice. It’s Karin. She’s visited me two times previously; she knew my name was Karin; she knew Sam’s name! I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to embarrass her. I just said, “Thank you Maria” and escorted her out. I shut the door and laughed. Just call me Janice I guess!