No More Dummy!

Dec 22, 2011 by cafebebemama

Ella is 3 1/2 years old. She has had a dummy for 3 1/2 years. Until yesterday. The Dummy Fairy came to take her gnarled, skanky dummy for another child to use (What is up with the Dummy Fairy? Icky!). It’s a Christmas miracle!

Way back in the early days, I swore that I would not give my baby girl a dummy. And then one day she wouldn’t stop crying. I hadn’t even bought a dummy! But one came with the Avent bottle/steriliser set that we had purchased and I was desperate. I thought, “What the hey? Maybe it will help her?” and popped the dummy in her mouth. Suck, suck, suck, suck. And thus began 3 1/2 years of dummy saturated days and nights.

If Ella was going to have dummies, however, I was not going to give her “novelty” dummies. She was going to have the least obtrusive dummy I could find. We settled on Avent dummies with the clear centre-piece so that nothing could impede her pretty face. We managed to find these dummies for the majority of the 3 1/2 years until recently when we resorted to the Avent dummies with the red centre-piece when there was no other choice.

When Ella began school in January, we had a minor reprieve with the need for the dummy. Since she would be at school 3 days a week from 9:15-3:15, we decided to enact a “dummy embargo”. When Ella woke up, she was to put her dummy in a dummy “box” where it would stay for the day. She could have the dummy for naps and sleep at night and in the car. That was to be it. Full stop. Erm, oops.

I caved on too many occasions. Ella would slide up to me and say, in the sweetest voice, “I just want to snuggle up with you on the couch!” which was code for “Give me my dummy please, glorious Mummy”. And I would give in because it was easier. Ella is a very convincing girl, you know. Her negotiating skills have her being groomed to be a UN consultant for Middle East Peace Talks. I don’t think we’ll send her though.

We had receeded into a really bad habit of her having the dummy wayyyyyy too much again. She would walk around, playing and chattering away with the dummy in. I SWORE that I wouldn’t be one of “those” mummies. You know the ones. The ones with the four year old in the pushchair who still has a dummy in and is talking through the dummy. Well guess what? I was one of those mummies…minus the pushchair for Ella anyway. Bad Mummy!

The other day, Ella started having this annoying, tickly cough. It was disrupting her sleep at night which was disrupting our sleep at night. We have enough sleep disruption with Sam so we were keen to find a solution and quick! Suddenly, we realised that Ella’s cough seem to be ENCOURAGED by her sucking on her dummy. Without her dummy in her mouth for several hours there was not one cough that came out. Once her dummy went back in, suddenly she was coughing again. Could it be the dummy? We tried to convince Ella of that. She wasn’t having it. But then, on Tuesday night, well, really the EARLY hours of Wednesday morning, Ella woke up with a coughing fit. The dummy had gone AWOL in the bed somewhere. Ella wanted it but I couldn’t be bothered to find it for her. I decided to use the opportunity to encourage her to snuggle up to something else to replace the dummy. She howled. We somehow managed to get her in our bed with two of Sam’s cuddly toys (he doesn’t need them just yet) and she slept. Without the dummy.

When she woke in the morning, we told her that we couldn’t find the dummy. She was sort of OK with that. Before we left the house, I made sure that I found the wayward dummy and put it in a secret hiding place that only hubby and I knew about. All was going swimmingly until we got in the car. The car is where Ella has ALWAYS had her dummy. As Mark started to back out of the driveway, Ella screamed, “MY DUMMY!!!” and went into a total meltdown, albeit, contained in her car seat in the car. I was sitting in the back seat with her (thankfully) so I began my pitch for dummy resolution.

“You see, Ella, the Dummy Fairy came by last night. She told us that there was a poorly baby who needed your dummy so we gave your dummy to the Dummy Fairy for this poorly baby. You want the poorly baby to feel better and have a lovely dummy like yours right?” is how it went. Through the tears came a bit of understanding, some snuffling and grudging acceptance with the promise of a cuddly, snuggly blanket or toy to replace the dummy. The tears stopped, we continued on our journey and we had a good day…without the dummy!

I managed to find a really cuddly, soft puppy from Marks & Spencer which Ella has named “Sinji” (the name of our departed Black Lab whom Ella adored). She went to sleep without the dummy and without fuss for the first time in her 3 1/2 years. Result! It really is a Christmas miracle. Funny how these things just manage to happen!

Attention Santa: Ella has put down the dummy! Feel free to shower her with more presents now! I can also report that while Sam does occasionally use the dummy for comfort, he is, in no way as fixated on it as Ella was. Wish us luck! Did you manage to wrangle the dummy from your child? What worked for you?