It’s Monday, 21 November, 2011. In 11 days I’ll be rolling up to Peterborough City Hospital to undergo a c-section to bring Bebe into our world. 12 days ago I was sitting in a consultant’s office at the same hospital being slightly disappointed over having our c-section scheduled 3 weeks away. What kind of idiot am I?
In the past 12 days I’ve welcomed family reinforcements in the form of my Dad and stepmom, we’ve transformed 2 bedrooms in our upstairs and ticked off a few more items from the Bebe shopping list. I’ll be blogging about our Project Changing Rooms this week but suffice it to say, the rooms look AWESOME! Ella is thoroughly enamoured of her new Big Girl room and I think our newly made over master bedroom looks like a boutique hotel. I’ve even revelled in organising, throwing out and sorting. Nesting…it’s joyful!
However, on Saturday I had a right proper Mummy meltdown over the most ridiculous thing ever. I apparently needed a release of some sort. Mark and Ella had let me have a lie-in on Saturday morning so I didn’t end up downstairs until the 8:00 hour for a change. I did some work on the laptop and then we started getting ready for the day. I wandered into the kitchen to find Mark struggling with emptying the rubbish bin. Emptying the rubbish bin is one of my least favourite jobs and I tend to stuff too much into it making it most difficult to get out of the bin. I took Mark’s bin aggravation and muttering personally and stormed out of the kitchen, STOMPED (like a child) up the stairs and SLAMMED the door to the bathroom. I turned the water on to run a bath and then sat down on the floor and SOBBED. Great big huge tears, hiccuping and everything. What a bloomin’ nana!
Mark came upstairs after I managed to extricate myself from the bath and I totally broke down again. Everything feels so overwhelming! **whinge alert** I am tired, can’t seem to sleep well at all, have ridiculous heartburn 90% of the time, am uncomfortable, look like the prow of a ship and despite being disappointed with the former 3 weeks of time I had, am freaking out about the 11 days I have left. Hence the meltdown.
Bless his cotton socks, Mark was so lovely with me. He cuddled me, calmed me, sat me down and talked through all of the issues I’m having. We’ve written out a list, cheered the tasks we’ve accomplished and helped me to look at everything RATIONALLY and not EMOTIONALLY. I suppose also weighing on my mind is Ella as well. She’s so excited about Bebe coming soon. She was “helping” to get Bebe’s room ready last night; organising all of the teeny toys in the Moses basket and tidying up the room in her very special way. I’m also devastated to have learned last week that I will be missing Ella’s first Christmas concert at preschool. Their concert is being held on Saturday 3 December, one day after Bebe is due to be delivered. So while Ella and the rest of my family are attending Ella’s first concert, I’ll be in hospital, on my own with Bebe. Weep.
The next 11 days are going to FLY by, I know. I’m grateful to have this blog to share my freak outs with you so please pardon my mutterings for the next short while. I’m back to nesting in a few hours as I’m writing this post at 3:30am…no 3am Feeding Club for me YET, just my ridiculousness.
Hey lady, glad you are feeling better. It can all be overwhelming and scary. Don’t worry about missing the concert. Y’all can watch video of it later and she can be the bug girl telling you all about it.
One thing that we did with my stepson was that he was the first person to meet the new baby (besides Dad). All the grannies, granddads, other family had to wait for a later visit while he met her and bequeathed the ceremonial first stuffed animal.
PS post home re-do pictures soon!
Ugh – those last few weeks are always awful. Hang in there. And what an amazing man you have. How lovely to have someone understanding and supportive.
PS – get someone to video the christmas concert so that you don’t have to miss it.
Oh the joyful hormones of the end of pregnancy! In pretty much the same situation earlier this year I had a meltdown over running out of teabags. I was about 1 week away from my csection,scared stiff, in absolute agony from very severe spd (hence the section) and just felt completely out of control. Then to top it all off I ran out of teabags, lets just say that my hubby and son ran to the shops!
Its sad that you will miss Ella’s play but ask someone to record it and then you can all watch it together (including Bebe) which will no doubt please Ella and she can sing the songs etc for you too x
Oh you poor thing! I actually feel much calmer than I have been since finally sorting out where the baby will be born (with only 3 weeks to go!) which was the source of many a meltdown over the last few months since moving again, although I’m sure i’ll have another one in the coming weeks. For now though I’m happy to leave the meltdowns to my other half who is running around panicking like a headless chicken, while I’m finally able to sit back and relax for the first time in my entire pregnancy. I remember when I was pregnant with my daughter, my meltdown over a power cut during a particularly long awaited episode of EastEnders (yes I’m that sad!) actually set me off and turned my Braxton Hicks into contractions (not that I realised it at the time of course!) and there was an incident where I was screaming at my sister for no apparent reason before bursting into tears and sobbing – again for no apparent reason! Don’t you just love those pregnancy hormones!
You’ll be fine and don’t feel guilty about missing Ella’s play, she will be so excited to see you and the baby that she won’t even remember you weren’t there – I promise! x
Bless your heart El Pregnata … I’m sure you’re rocking ‘prow of a ship’ chic!
All perfectly normal … hormones are a bitch, right?
Cafe Bebe Lady! I should check this more often… had no idea you are preggers again – CONGRATS!!!! I’m sure the above story was not fun going through it, but reading it was like a lifetime TV movie! Good action/drama and a sweet realistic ending we can all learn from! Your hubby sounds wonderful – happy for you
Nice to hear your Dad and step mom have been there too. Hope they are well!
Take care! I’ll be thinking of you and sending major prayers in 11 days! can’t wait to hear more.
Love,
Kathleen
Good luck Lovely Lady xx (& that meltdown sounds PERFECTLY reasonable to me;)
Meltdowns are allowed and reasonable at the moment so don’t worry. Things will be just fine
Oh you poor sausage! This discomforts of late pregnancy and the hormonal changes get us all in the end. There’s nothing wrong with a mini-mummy-meltdown once in a while
Mark sounds lovely and I’m sure as you say the next 11 days are going to whizz by – at least you have NaBloPoMo to keep you extra occupied!
And you start to get the guilts about your fiirstborn round about now, and then everything is bound to get you down. I was awful, but I can promise you it will be ok, and it sounds like you have lovely support. Mine would have just told me to pull myself together! Not what you need to hear when you’re 38 weeks pregnant! I am loving your Britmums pre-posting at the moment. Now that’s what I call preparation!
Hey meltdowns are normal it is exhausting and you’ve been brilliant. Take care of yourself, go with the flow and you’ll do fine! Huge HUGS!
We all go through it and it is great that Mark was there to support you. Just seen your message on titter so good luck and looking forward to seeing the new little bundle of joy.