The Truth Hurts

The battle wages on and I have decided that the truth hurts.  As does running.  Actually, I have discovered 3 truths in this bloomin’ Mummy Tummy Begone challenge.

1. I apparently have the smallest ears known to man/womankind.
2. I really need some proper run/walk gear.
3. I don’t know how to run.

It’s hard to accept the truth but I’m coming to terms with it and so should you.  Shall I elaborate so you can share in my lameness misery?  OK then, here we go:

I apparently have the smallest ears known to man/woman kind.  Who knew?  When I went out the door the first night and plugged in the headphones for the iPod and trundled off, I thought everything was fine.  Oops, wait, one headphone just popped out…plug back in.  Oops, now the other one…plug back in.  Dammit…again!  Wait…I can’t reach it…get back in there you *”£$%>!  This went on for the rest of the workout.  Pop…scramble…plug back in… You get the pattern!  I used hubby’s headphones the first night and the PROPER iPod headphones the 2nd and 3rd nights.  The same thing happened with both sets.  The headphones are the ones that fit IN your ears and either I have the smallest inner ear canal or these headphones are just not designed properly.  It’s very irritating when you charge off on the RUN part of a run/walk workout and both ears simultaneously reject the one thing that’s keeping your feet moving!  Not terribly inspiring or motivational.  I would greatly appreciate any suggestions on how I can remedy this situation in an inexpensive way!  Duct tape is really not an option.

I really need some proper run/walk gear!  A Mummy Tummy is a horrible thing.  It makes the waistbands of ALL trousers/jeans/whatever roll down and make you feel like a right lard ass.  This includes any “leggings” that you might think are appropriate for exercising in.  If you looked at me from the hips down, I’m in pretty darn good shape.  I’ve been lucky to not carry weight on my legs and bum.  In fact, I think my trouser size from the HIPS down wouldn’t be half bad.  It’s when you take into account the massive expanse of my belly that I have problems.  When I run I have discovered that the leggings that I’m running in gradually make their way down to my ass and cling there waiting for me to “hoick” them back up.  Again, not terribly helpful when running.  It goes a bit like this at the moment:

• Run, run, run…bra strap up…headphone jammed back in…
• Run, run, run…both hands grab waistband of leggings and jack back up…headphone jammed back in…
• Run, run, run…push hair out of face…bra strap up…headphone…trousers…run, run…headphone…
• You get the picture, eh???

Recommendations now are welcome regarding what I should wear when I venture out again.  I’m getting right proper p***ed off with myself.

I don’t know how to run!  I’ve had nightmares dreams where I’m being chased (as that’s usually the only occasion I would consider running for) and I have forgotten how to run.  That dream is now a reality.  I feel like I am PLODDING down the road and not knowing how to run efficiently.  When I finish each section of running in my workout, my feet can barely take a proper step!  I have so much strain in my tibialis anterior muscle (the muscle that runs along your shin and activates your foot to pick up and step) that it seizes up after running and doesn’t want me to go any further!  I then get tired and plod even more and then try to remember to have a proper heel strike and push through my foot as opposed to having a bit of a marching stride.  But then I’m too tired and my legs hurt too much and so I have to stop!  I don’t know what I’m doing and I apparently don’t know how to run.  I’m willing to work on it but I need someone to tell me what the heck I’m doing wrong.  Who doesn’t know how to run?  I’m considering chucking all the proper form ideas and just running like Phoebe from “Friends” in the episode where she and Rachel go running together.  For the two of you who haven’t seen it, Phoebe runs like a complete nutter- arms flailing, legs akimbo (I love that word)…LIKE A CHILD.  She runs that way because it’s how she ran when she was a kid and running was fun then.  As long as I keep running under cover of darkness maybe it could work for me too!  Please leave your running suggestions in the comments below…I seriously need help!

That’s my Mummy Tummy Begone report for right now.  I managed a 20 minute workout last night but missed Wednesday due to dinner at the inlaws which ran into 9pm.  Maybe that’s why I felt so rubbish last night…a day off made me feel like I was starting over.  However, I have some incentive in the very near future…I’m going to be working with a brilliant woman called Wendy Powell at No More Excuses who will be doing some guest blogging on Cafe Bebe to help out the women of the world who are struggling just like me!  Stay tuned to Cafe Bebe for more information…it’s gonna be good!  Also, I’m going to be taking part in a new campaign for a BIG trainer company that rhymes with FleeCrok…I’ll keep you posted on that one as well.  It just might be some incentive for you as well!  Thanks for sticking with me on this one…I promise to do my level best as long as you’re with me.  Mummy Tummy Begone!